Thursday, December 2, 2010

Schooled

This has been a season of getting schooled.  There's a bit of irony in that statement for me--a former, sometimes, wannabe teacher.  The last time I took a break from teaching it was to stay home with my 2 babies.  This time it's because of chronic back, hip, and leg pain.  Well, so the pain is just the catalyst forcing me to take the break.  Actually, as I  finished my master's degree in gifted and talented education, God spoke to me in a dream--as He has done from time to time over the years.  In this dream, He told me it was time to take care of my family.  I talked with Him about what that would mean--no extra money for clothes, other lifestyle changes, but mostly about how this just seemed to be odd timing as I was just finishing my M.Ed. to make me a better teacher.  I decided in my waking hours this dream must have just been about how tired I was from working full time, trying to take care of my husband and children, and earning a master's degree.  It was a lot.  So...I kept working.

Shortly after this talk with God the chronic pain started.  Do I think God caused it?  I don't think so.  I don't know.  Maybe?  I sure know He's using it.  I hope that in this process I am being refined, because it's been painful--emotionally, spiritually, financially, as well as physically.  I loved my job, loved my school, loved my team of teachers, loved my students, and loved being in positions of leadership and the many accolades that came with it all.  I also worked in a place and position in which I was able to minister to and touch the lives of many children and families--it was my calling.  The transition has been difficult.  But.  I do love my family more.  I am a better wife and mother when I am not working.  I do get to do a lot more things with and for my family.  I remind myself of that frequently as I am still being schooled in this job as a stay at home wife and mother still looking for purpose and meaning--my new calling.

One thing I've missed is the continual learning, researching, writing, instructing, etc. which teaching gifted students brought me.  I'm concerned about my brain getting soft.  I've never planned on blogging, though I've always been a writing and always enjoyed reading the blogs of others.  For now...this is just a place for me to express myself...

...and exercise the organ in my skull a bit...while getting schooled.